


Wildest Dreams

by okaybutcoffeefirst



Category: Daredevil (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-03-19
Packaged: 2018-05-24 18:57:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6163297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okaybutcoffeefirst/pseuds/okaybutcoffeefirst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>my last request is<br/>say you'll remember me, standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset. babe<br/>red lips and rosy cheeks, say you'll see me again even if it's just in your wildest dreams.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> okay so new story that came to me while I was listening to Taylor Swift, and I tried to ignore it because I have so much work to do and so many half written/unwritten pieces of work floating about but this one really called to me soooooo hopefully you'll enjoy. This chapter is a little boring but It'll pick up. I hope you enjoy :)

Ever the optimist, Kat looked around at the apartment that others might have called desolate (or in the words of her friend May, who’d looked around with her before she’d signed the lease ‘an absolute fucking shit hole’) and grinned widely. Her mind spun as she imagined exactly how she’d place her furniture to make use of the limited space and the colours she would paint the walls and the carpet she’d get fitted, this would be a new start and new home.

This would be good, she could just feel it. 

Her furniture wasn’t arriving until tomorrow afternoon, so her task for the day was to start scrubbing and making this place smell less… like a giant rodent toilet. She pulled her hair into a tight bun on the top her head and braced herself for a long day.

Kat’s friends always said she had a talent, a talent for bringing the sunshine into a dark room, the happiness into the saddest day, her laughter filled rooms and turned heads. She thought it was cliché and would simply roll her eyes when they mentioned it but even she couldn’t deny that her constant instance on seeing the potential for good in everything (‘it’s pretty fucking annoying sometimes, couldn’t you just be cynical like the rest of us?’ more fine words from the mouth of May) was really helping her out right now. It would be so easy to let everything that had happened in the last few months overwhelm her, pull her down and keep her trapped in the darkness that sometimes crept over and blocked her from the light but she kept fighting, pushing herself forward with the knowledge and belief that ‘it would get better, it has to’ and so far, she was right. The apartment was already looking brighter and feeling warmer now the windows had been sufficiently cleaned to actually allow the light in.

***

As Foggy and Matt turned the corner, Foggy noticed the open door and frowned “Isn’t that place empty?” he questioned. 

“I guess there’s a new tenant” Matt shrugged, he could hear movement in the apartment and a fluttering heartbeat.

“That poor sap, that place was a wreck! We should see if they need help” Matt smirked, typical Foggy.

Matt followed him to the opened door dutifully.  
Kat was in the cleaning zone, she was so focused on removing the stubborn stain from the wall that she’d had forgotten the outside world existed so when she heard a noise behind her, she was caught by surprise. Spinning round she saw two grown men standing in her doorway, one awkwardly waving with a grin on his face framed by blond hair and the other leaning against the doorframe, red tinted glasses covering his eyes making his expression almost unreadable, she supressed a scream and stumbled back. 

“Oh shit, no, hi, sorry” The one with the blond hair looked panicked “we should have knocked, sorry. I’m Foggy and this is Matt” he gestured to the man at the doorframe. “He lives at the end of the corridor and we thought we’d see if you needed any help”

Cursing herself slightly for being so jumpy, she took a breath and put on her best smile “It’s okay, I just wasn’t expecting to see anyone and I was in my own world so uh, yeah hi. Nice to meet you! I was hoping to meet some neighbours!” She was bubbling now, practically vibrating with excitement as she got better look at her new neighbour. 

At first glance he was cute, there was no denying that. A small smile had settled onto his otherwise passive face but she noticed he was peppered with bruises all in different stages of healing, she had a suspicion they didn’t end at his neckline either. The edges of dark circles were creeping out from underneath his glasses, and while the suit he was wearing was clean and well kept, he himself  
seemed disordered. In his right hand he held a white cane, she made a mental note to not offer the guy a handshake. 

Foggy was laughing as he crossed the threshold, “Nice to meet you too. I didn’t think anybody would be moving into this place anytime soon, no offence but last time I saw it I wouldn’t say it was even inhabitable. Looks nicer now though” He added hastily with a grin as he gazed around the room. Kat decided there and then that she liked Foggy. His face was friendly, pretty, and there was something in his eyes that made her feel just a little bit safe.

“Yeah, it’s in a bit of state” she shrugged “nothing a little bit of paint and hard work can’t fix” 

“That’s the spirit!” Foggy placed a warm hand on her shoulder, she felt herself tense but fought the urge to shrug it off or pull away or just run out the room. He sensed her discomfort and quickly removed it, with another small smile. 

Matt could sense some tension, “You should join us for dinner, nothing special just a takeout but it’s always good to get to know the neighbours and Foggy spends so much time at my place, it’d be best to get used to him” He moved into the room slightly.

“Yes! Great idea” Foggy said excitedly, he went to put his hand back on her shoulder but caught himself “Sorry, I’m a touchy guy.” Kat smiled at him, and moved her gaze back to Matt who was studying her.

She thought for a moment, not knowing anyone in area meant she'd accepted that she'd be spending the next few weeks alone but that really didn't appeal to her, she was social and she wanted to make friends, who better than people she shared a building with. “Food would be so great, I’ve been so wrapped up trying to get this place liveable I haven’t even eaten today.” 

“It’s settled” Matt smiled warmly, Kat couldn’t help but noticed that it brightened his whole face. “Foggy why don’t you give Karen a ring and see if she’s free too” 

“Good plan, she can never refuse free food” Foggy pulled his phone from his pocket and began to make a call.

“Welcome to the building” Matt said.

Kat felt a sense of warmth flood her, this was going to be okay. It really was going to be better.


	2. Chapter 2

Kat followed Foggy’s lead and entered Matt’s apartment, gazing round. It was at least three times the size of her own, dishevelled but not quite messy (not unlike the man himself she thought, then decided it was rude to make assumptions on someone you’d met 10 minutes ago), sparsely furnished and not decorated. This place could be beautiful she thought, with some decent furniture and pastel décor.

“Take a seat” Matt gestured to the sofas, as he placed his bag on a dining table. Kat nodded, then frowned and felt herself turn red.

“I wouldn’t worry, I do it all the time and I’ve known the guy years” Foggy laughing said as he walked towards the sofa.

Matt snorted from the kitchen, “She nodded, huh?”

“Uhh god, sorry” was all she could manage, still blushing. 

“Don’t be, Matt doesn’t mind” Foggy said, Matt called through to affirm “I don’t.”

“And seriously, take a seat. You must be beat.”

She nodded and sat down next to Foggy, chewing the inside of her cheek nervously. 

“So what made you move into Hell’s Kitchen?” Foggy asked.

“Honestly?” He nodded “It’s cheap and they didn’t ask for a reference or down payment, I left my last place in… uh, a hurry to say the least so I took what I could get” She shrugged, changing the subject “What do you guys do anyway? The suits say it’s something important but the haircuts say otherwise” she grinned to let him know she was joking.

“Oh we’re lawyers, we’ve got our own firm” Foggy smiled, clearly proud. Matt walked back through to join them, three beers in his hands and a similar smile on his face.

“Oh! Really?” Kat wasn’t good at hiding her surprise and they both laughed.

“Always that tone when we tell people” Matt said as he held out the drinks, 

“I didn’t mean any offence” she said as she took the drink from his hand “I just really didn’t get the lawyer vibe from you guys, you’re don’t seem…”

“Creepy?” “Money grabbing?” Foggy and Matt finished her sentence in unison.

“Well… yeah” she took a sip, 

“We’ll take it as a compliment” There was a loud knock at the door, “Its open Karen” 

Kat couldn’t help but gaped at the woman who crossed the threshold. She was beautiful, wearing dark blue high waisted jeans that accentuated her long legs and her strawberry blonde hair was pulled   
to the side to drape over one shoulder. There was a warm smile on her lips that faltered slightly when she met Kat’s eye.

“Oh, hi!” She said, looking between Matt, Foggy and Kat awkwardly.

“Hey Karen, Meet Matt’s new neighbour…” Foggy frowned “this is awkward, we didn’t even ask your name”

“Oh right yeah it’s Katlyn, just Kat actually. Hi!” She held out her hand, which Karen shook politely. 

“Nice to meet you” Karen smiled and sat herself next to Matt, “I actually can’t believe anyone would move into that place” she froze “No that came out wrong, I didn’t mean… I just”

Kat laughed “No it’s okay, it’s not in great shape but I like a fixer upper. I’ve got some great ideas about how to turn it into … less of a shithole.” That earnt her a laugh from the three of them “my goal   
is to have it unrecognizable by the end of the month”

The conversation drifted around as she got to know them all, she learnt that Karen worked for Matt and Foggy and while she didn’t go into specifics that they’d gotten her out a pretty serious situation. As they told more stories about their work it became obvious that this was what they were good at, getting people out of bad places. She didn’t believe in fate (how could she, that would imply that what had happened to her had happened for a reason, had been destined to happen in some fucked up way and that thought made her sick) but she thought it was pretty lucky to have landed the apartment near these guys. 

“What about you, where are you working?” Matt asked as they were eating

“I used to be a grade school teacher, but none of the schools nearby were hiring and I hate subbing so I’ll be working at the library for the time being” she shrugged, she’d miss teaching and her kids.

“I didn’t even know they still had librarians, I thought it was all done with computers now” Foggy teased.

Kat laughed “Yeah I’ll actually be the only member of staff, besides the cleaners and the woman who comes in for the kid’s story time twice a week”

Before anyone else had time to speak, the sound of gunshots rang through the apartment and they all froze. 

“It’s probably nothing, might just be fireworks” Foggy broke the silence that followed, a waver in his voice gave away that he had no trust in his own words. None of them made a move, seemingly   
frozen in their seats. 

“Maybe we’ll see an appearance of the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen” Karen murmured, casting her eyes outside as though she expected him to be hanging off the roof and peeking in. Kat snorted at the idea   
but quickly turned it into a sneeze.

“Ah yes, the infamous Daredevil” Foggy scoffed slightly “What do you think of him, Kat?”

Kat bit her tongue for a moment. Everyone knew that you should never discuss politics, religion and masked vigilantes with friends at dinner but all three were waiting for her answers so she took a chance.

“I respect what he’s doing and I admire him for it but… you’d think he could do it without looking like he’s just escaped a BDSM basement club. I saw some photos of his new ‘outfit’ and there were horns. Horns?!” She took a breath “It just seems ridiculous and like it probably draws more attention to himself and really, there must be a screw loose somewhere for him to go about flying off rooftops and flipping about the place like a low budget Avenger. Otherwise I mean yeah, top guy”. 

Matt was the first to start laughing, his face lit up like Kat hadn’t seen before and his hand clutched at his side as he doubled over then Foggy joined in. She felt a bit like she was missing out on a big joke, what she’d said wasn’t quite ~that funny and as Karen shot her a glance, she could tell she wasn’t the only one confused.

“I mean, you’re not wrong” Foggy said between gasping breaths “definitely not wrong.”

“No, I’d have to agree with everything you said” Matt said, after he’d calmed himself. He took a long swig of his drink, still smiling widely. 

“Well I guess the suit is a bit much” Karen frowned “but he’s doing what he thinks right for Hell’s Kitchen and I owe him my life because of that”

“Oh no, I never meant… I mean, I agree that what he does it amazing and well intentioned. I just…” Kat stuttered “I guess I’m a pacifist at heart and it’s hard to see the good in violence sometimes”

Karen nodded but didn’t reply. Kat hoped she hadn’t offended her, she liked Karen, her general first impression was that she seemed smart and funny, and devoted to what she believed in – that was definitely the sort of friend Kat wanted in her life now. 

Exhaustion hit her as she yawned, she didn’t realised how tired she was (or how late it was getting) until then. “I think I’m going to call it a night” standing up and stretching herself out to ease the ache. “It was so nice to meet you guys and for you to invite me over and…”

Matt cut her off – thankfully - before she could stammer on anymore “Don’t mention it, just uhm… give us a shout if you need anything” she nodded (and internally groaned at herself for doing so) then waved her goodbyes before leaving the apartment. The hallway air felt cold against her skin, sending a little shiver down her spine and she hurried back to her own place, which when she compared it to Matt’s, looked even more bare and dank than when she’d left it. 

“One step at a time” she sighed to herself as she cleared away all the cleaning supplies she’d left lying around “It won’t be long, everything will settle” she had an awful tendency to talk to herself when she was alone. 

Then pulling off her clothes, she collapsed into her bed (if that’s what you can call a mattress on the floor) and was practically asleep before her head touched the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so oops I was in such a rush to post the first chapter that I forgot to even like... set the scene? so basically I imagine this set just after S1 finished, Foggy know but Karen doesn't and things right now are a little calm on the bad guy front but there's an air of unease about.  
> Anyway I hope you liked this chapter, drop me a message or something if you did :) I know my punctuation is freaking atrocious and it doesn't seem possible but I am an actual university student who gets called out on this constantly so apologies for that (I'm 99% sure if my lecturers read this, they'd be able to identify it was my work from the shit use of commas omg)   
> These first two chapters (and maybe the next) are really just setting the scene for the actual plot stuff so yeah, bit slow but it'll get there.   
> Cheers for reading :D


	3. Chapter 3

Matt was good at shutting off the unimportant noise - most of the time - but as he sat on the cold hardwood floor of his apartment and attempted to focus on the sounds of the city, all he could hear was his new neighbours heartbeat. The place had been empty for so long, so maybe it might take a while but he could shut out the guy upstairs who spent all day watching porn (on full volume, he had no catholic shame clearly) and the neighbour below who sang to her cat when she was lonely so why couldn’t he shut out the sound overwhelming him now. The sound of the slightest movements she made against the bed sheets, her shallow breaths, the blood moving around her body.

He thought it was probably just a bit fucking creepy. Foggy had said it many times, that it was beyond weird, like spying on someone but Matt couldn’t help it and he was trying! 

Kat was interesting. They’d all agreed on that when she’d left. Karen had noted with a tone she tried to pass as indifferent that she was ‘very pretty’, which he knew was true but there was more - She seemed bright and cheerful, she had an air of honest optimism about her and a very nice laugh, one that made you want to join in. There was something hidden beneath that though. The thing that had made her nearly jump from her skin when they’d first met and that had made her cringe when Foggy had touched her (Matt knew Foggy was many things, but scary or imposing, no. Nobody cringed from Foggy, there was something about him that made everyone feel at ease). It wasn’t that he thought she was being dishonest with them, they hadn’t known her more than a few hours so he didn’t expect her to tell them her life story (that would be beyond hypocritical of him) but she seemed to dance around whatever it was, any mention of why she’d moved here so quickly was passed over as soon as it was touched on.

No, Matt thought, there was something. And it was serious. 

Now her breathing was harsh and heavy, a nightmare probably. Matt felt a pang of guilt and tried to focus on the sounds of the cars and trains, tried to listen for sound of shouts or screams, something else. Just anything else.

**

Katlyn woke the same way she had done for the last month, to the sound of her own screams and her hands clawing against her face.  
It took her a second to remember where she was, what she was doing there, and why she was screaming. When the memories came back and the nightmare faded, she choked back a sob and focused on calming down.

Deep breathes. 

Deep breathes and good thoughts. 

Deep breathes, good thoughts and a knock on the door.

No, wait?

Kat scrambled up from her mattress on the floor, and stared uneasily at the door. Who on earth would be knocking on her door in the middle of the night. 

“Kat? Its Matt from next door, are you alright?”

Had she screamed that loudly? She grimaced, and hesitantly unlocked the door. 

“I’m so sorry” were the first words she could form as she stared up at him, in his pyjamas and even in the dim lighting of the corridor the concern was clear on his face “I really didn’t mean to wake you up” 

“Don’t apologise, it’s alright” his hand rested on doorframe, “do you… should I come in or are you okay?” 

She hesitated, the company would be nice, at least until her nerves settled and she could fall back to sleep but she didn’t want Matt to think she was any weirder than he probably already did. 

“No its okay, I’m okay. I’m really sorry I woke you.” she shuffled her feet, heart still racing.

“You didn’t, trust me” he remained in the doorway, “I could use a cup of tea though or something stronger, if you’ve got it?” 

She laughed a little “I think there’s a bottle of wine in one of my bags, my friend said it’s unlucky not to have alcohol in a house” turning around to rummage through her few possessions “Ah ha!” she   
pulled out a bottle of (painfully cheap) white wine.

Matt grinned “Never heard that one before, but clearly your friend knows what they’re talking about” he waited in the doorway “Could I just…” he held out his hand awkwardly and Kat couldn’t believe she’d basically forgotten… that he was blind 

Who the fuck forgets someone is blind? Ugh. She grabbed his hand and pulled him into the room, closing the door behind him.

“Well I mean I could just hold your arm, but holding hands is fine too. Very 3rd grade” 

She flushed furiously, “well this couldn’t go any worse.” But she’d dug her hole already so might as well climb in it. She held onto his hand and walked him over to the only place in her house they could   
sit, her mattress. ‘I really did not think this through’ was all she could think as she explained it to him. But Matt was smiling as he placed himself down carefully on her makeshift bed, she joined him and poured them both a glass (well plastic cup, since that was all she could find) of wine. He took a small sip and tried to hide the disgust but it was mirrored by Kat’s own facial expression as she drank.

“Oh my god, no its awful” she grabbed the cup from him “don’t even try to pretend, what the fuck what she thinking giving me this?” he laughed.

A silence settled over them, Kat sighed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Matt asked, his tone made it clear that he wasn’t talking about the wine.

“Not much to say, not really.” 

“I don’t think that’s true”

“I thought you were a lawyer, not a therapist?” she quipped lightly.

“You’d be surprised how often those things overlap” another silence “I didn’t mean to pry, I heard the scream… we all have things that keep us up at night Kat” 

Kat chewed at the inside of her cheek, staring out the small window “I’m a positive person, I always have been and don’t let things bother me or eat at me. I just keep going, you know? I’m not even angry or upset at what happened, there’s no point in that but… at night, I don’t know. I have no control on my subconscious and it lets me know that every night” 

“Bet you’re really regretting inviting be over for dinner now” She tried to lift the mood, Matt laughed again and she was glad he didn’t ask more questions.

He looked different without his glasses, the dark circles were more obvious. If I don’t go to sleep soon, she thought, I’ll look like that in the morning. 

“Trust me when I say I don’t. Though I’ll be tasting that wine for week.” He smiled at her, warm and friendly. 

“You’re a nice guy Matt” Kat laid her head on her pillow, “so…what keeps you up at night?”

Matt laughed quietly, “More than I could begin to explain in one night” 

She felt herself drift off.

**

Matt placed a blanket over her carefully and navigated his way carefully out of the apartment and back to his own. His head felt clearer, less crowded but now he was tired and ready for his own bed. It was the first night in a long time that he hadn’t gone out on to the streets as Daredevil, it gnawed at him and there was an ache, deep in the pit of his stomach. He knew he’d be no good to anyone tonight, he was too tired, too distracted, he’d get sloppy and make mistakes, no, the city would just have to wait till tomorrow. 

But despite the rationality of his decision, the ache was still there as he pulled the sheet over himself, almost painful. “That” he thought as he closed his eyes “that’s what keeps me awake at night”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you like it :) just a quick one really but i like it .


	4. Chapter 4

Kat woke early despite her restless night, the sun was too bright through her window (‘curtains’ she grumbled, ‘I need curtains’) and hot on her skin. She was sticky with sweat as she untangled herself and broke free of the blanket. 

“Coffee or shower?” she mumbled to herself, standing up and shuffling out the bedroom. As it always does, coffee won out. With the coffee machine arriving along with her other possession in the afternoon, she made do with the instant stuff. It wasn’t really to her taste but it would satisfy her caffeine craving for now.

Then came the shower, the water pressure was terrible and the temperature seemed to have only two options “freeze to death” or “welcome to hell” so she scrubbed herself clean as quickly as possible and hopped out.

Now she was caffeinated and clean, the rest of the day looked good and by the end of it her apartment would be one step closer to being a home.

*

She wiled away the hours by cleaning the rest of her apartment with her iPod on. Her mood bright and cheerful as she sang along (badly, oh so badly – she was thankful no one could hear her) to her most upbeat playlist and by the time she heard the van honk its horn as it pulled up outside, the house was as clean as it was going to get without hiring professionals.

“Where should we put all this stuff?” One of the two men in the Van asked when she met them outside

“Oh uhm, do you mind carrying things up a few flights?” Kat used her best smile to her advantage, which was probably completely unethical and a little bit sleazy but it worked, the guys looked at each   
other and nodded. It took them all the better part of two hours to move all the boxes and place the furniture where she wanted it. She made them a cup of coffee before they left and thanked them immensely. 

Then it was the momentous job of unpacking, which was overwhelming but still therapeutic. She had too many books, too many photos, too much junk in general and no idea where she’d fit it all. Her bedroom was sorted first, clothes in their rightful place, photos of her family on dressing table.

She hung as many photos as she could in her front room. Her favourites were of her nephews and they got pride of place next to her armchair and bookcase.

‘I have too many candles’ she thought out loud as she tried find a place for 7th she’d unpacked ‘no-one needs this many candles’ 

It was getting late, well into the evening but she was finally finished. The place was looking like home, smelling like a home and she could make coffee! With the last candle placed, she slumped into   
her armchair, coffee on her coffee table and lamp lighting the room.

**

Foggy and Matt walked back to Matt’s apartment after a late night in the office, the night was cool and clear so they made no effort to rush.

“I think we’re getting there, y’know?” Foggy said “making a name for ourselves”

Matt nodded in agreement, it had been a good day and they were both on a bit of a high from it. Foggy was practically skipping and pulling Matt along with him. He thought they must look a little ridiculous, grown men with their arms linked and wide smiles but he didn’t mind. It was nice to have a moment with Foggy that didn’t feel strained, those had been few and far between since he’d found out Matt’s secret, Matt was going to revel in it.

“We should stop by Kat’s place, make sure she’s settled in okay” Foggy suggested as they turned the corner into the building.

“Good idea, she’s just made coffee” The smell was strong and appealing, but almost overpowered by the smell of 16 different candles. Why did she need that many? He thought as they walked up the stairs. 

“Ugh that’s still so creepy, Matt.” Foggy groaned but it was light hearted, more teasing than a criticism.

“I know, but useful. You have to admit” Foggy laughed 

**  
Kat was sipping her coffee, gazing out the window (the view was awful, but still) and when she heard the door knock she jumped, lucky not to spill coffee on herself. 

Placing the coffee on the table, she opened the door to see Foggy and Matt, arm in arm smiling.

“You guys make a cute couple” She said lightly, looking at their linked arms with a smile

“Thank you, I’ve always thought so… and so would Matt if he could see us” Foggy walked in dragging Matt with him, deciding he didn’t need an invite but Kat didn’t mind anyway. She was just glad it was in better shape than it had been. “You’ve been busy!” He gestured around to her now full flat.

She smiled brightly “What do you think?”

“I love it” Matt said with a smirk, Foggy snorted and unlinked their arms “It looks amazing, very homely” Kat grinned at him and gently slapped Matt’s shoulder as she walked passed. 

“Would you like a coffee? I just brewed some” She walked to the kitchen counter.

“That’d be great, thanks” Matt replied.

“Milk, no sugar” Foggy called 

She pulled two new mugs from the cupboard, excited to be able to use them on actual visitors. While the guys made themselves comfortable on her sofa she poured the coffees.

“When do you start work?” Matt asked, as she placed a coffee on the table in front of him

“Next week, I wish it was sooner. I wanted to start being busy as soon as possible really” she sat down in her armchair and watched as a large grin appeared on Foggy’s face

“We should go out! Get some drinks, show you around the neighbourhood. It’ll be great”

“But.. I just made coffee? I’m in my pyjamas” Matt was smiling too now, Kat had a feeling she was going to be ganged up on.

“Drink your coffee, put on your glad rags and we’ll paint this town red” The excitement between them was palpable, she sighed and stood up.

“Give me 15 minutes” she was too easily persuaded, easily led. Always her downfall. 

“Yes! Oh Kat, we’re going to be good friends. I can tell” Fogg said, she rolled her eyes as she walked into her bedroom, pulling the door closed behind her.

**  
45 minutes later, she was already tipsy (had she eaten today? She probably should have eaten) and shivering slightly as they walked to the next bar but grinning. She walked between Matt and Foggy, arms linked with them both. 

“We’re going to get so drunk, like college level drunk. 'Can’t remember our names, end up in another city with our heads shaved and dyed pink' drunk!” Foggy says as the walk over the threshold and straight to the counter to order.

Countless drinks later, she was on the dancefloor and swaying with the music. It was dark, crowded, her heart was hammering and head spinning but she was having fun, so much more fun than she’d had in years. Foggy was besides her, dancing with a girl he’d met a few drinks ago. Matt was leaning on the bar, he’d told her pretty clearly that he didn’t dance and none of her drunken pleading could change his mind.

When the song finished, she wobbled back to him and leant her head on his shoulder until things stopped spinning.

“Matt, I am very very drunk” She said after a moment, he laughed and sympathetically patted her back. It made her stomach flip and she remembered why she didn’t mix her drinks.

“I think we should probably call it a night, what’s Foggy doing?” Kat turned around to see Foggy entangled with the girl he’d been dancing with, mouths locked together. She blushed furiously and turned back to face Matt.

“I don’t think he’ll miss us, honestly but I’ll let him know we’re leaving” She said, well attempted to say, Matt nodded.

“Foggy” she called over the music “Foggy, we’re going”

There was a sound, not unlike a toilet plunger, and Foggy resurfaced “Already? The night is young!!?” he was hard to take serious when he had lipstick smeared on his face.

“If I drink anymore, I might die” He started to say something but Kat cut him off “I’ve had such a great time, though. I never thought I’d be able to make friends as great as you guys so quickly” uh oh emotional drunk Kat was making an appearance, it was definitely time to leave. 

Matt appeared behind her and took hold of her arm suddenly, “I’ll see you tomorrow Foggy, bright and early” 

And they were walking out of the bar, Kat was momentarily amazed by the way her dress looked caught in the breeze and streetlight glow

“I wish you could see my dress Matt” she said, too drunk to really be tactful “Oh that sounded terrible didn’t it? I just meant it’s very pretty, everyone should be looking at my dress”

He was quiet for a moment then asked “What does it look like?”

“It dark blue, navy blue I think. I like navy blue because my friend once told me that it made my eyes look brighter. It’s… got short sleeves and it's tight at the top, but flowy and pleated at the waist. Oh   
I don’t know Matt, I’m shit at describing things”

“That’s okay, I got the picture. What colour are your eyes?”

“Blue, very pale blue”

“Hair?”

“Dark brown” she added “it’s shoulder length, straight mostly”

Another silence, their arms still linked as they walked. She was deep in thought, the cold air sobering her up just a little, she stared at Matt for a while as they continued down the street. 

“It was an accident, when I was a kid. I miss it, but I’m fine without it. I don’t think it holds me back… even if I can see you or your dress”

It was like he’d read her mind, or got asked the questions she’d been thinking too often not to know how to respond. She didn’t know how to reply coherently so just gripped his arm a little tighter and leant her head on his arm as they walked, she hoped it came across as comforting and not like a drunken attempt at a grope.

“Quid pro quo” he said 

“What do you want to know?” she knew his answer 

“What made you move so quickly? What wakes you up at night?” 

Kat wasn’t sure where to start, how to start even but she figured the beginning was probably the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> weeeelp this is a little longer so i hope you like it :) I'm getting into it a bit. I really appreciate feedback and the like, so if you feel like it drop me a comment! I'm going away in a week for a trip with my uni (I'm really hoping none of my friends read this because I'd definitely be giving myself away oops) so I'll try and get a chapter or two out in the next week before I go and get consumed with work.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains references to Domestic Violence.

“I was 22, so this was like 3 years ago – if you were wondering how old I am - and I’d just got my first real job after college. I was still young and naïve, I met this guy and I fell head over heels. It was ridiculous honestly, I idolised him and lost myself entirely in the relationship but it seemed normal y’know? He was okay at first, nice and attentive, warm and friendly but I guess they always are” she took a breath, “but that only lasted 6 months, we moved into together and everything just went wrong. We were getting ready to go out one day and he made a comment about my dress and how I looked, I can’t remember exactly what it was now. Probably because he said so many horrible things after but I was shocked at the time, it really hurt me and gave my confidence a knock. Then it didn’t stop, it was daily. Little comment about my hair or the way I’d put my make up on or my clothes, picking away at me slowly. It hurt but when I brought it up he said I was being silly, exaggerating. I’d mention it to friends and they shrugged it off, because it was never around them. He was always so nice around them”

Matt pulled them to a stop, and gestured to the bench so they sat. Had she been more sober, she might have questioned how he’d known there was a bench there.

“So I figured I was, overthinking it. He loved me, he wanted me to look good and feel good. Then he started getting controlling, telling me when I could and couldn’t go out, telling me who I couldn’t see and if I tried to argue it would escalate to violence. Just a push here and there at first and then I found myself explaining away bruises on my arms, and black eyes. I look back and think, why didn’t I leave then? When he was just throwing me into walls? But it wasn’t so clear cut, or it didn’t feel that way. I loved him - even then - so much. I couldn’t imagine life without him, we’d been together 2 years at this point and no-one really suspected anything. I was clumsy and he was charming so nobody thought much of my bruises. It just kept getting worse, he was telling me when to eat, what to wear, laying out my clothes for me like I was a child. I couldn’t take a shower without permission.”

She was aware she was crying but she couldn’t stop now, the words just fell from her mouth. 

“I mean the relationship was dead by this point, obviously. We weren’t couple, I was his pet. I wasn’t even a person at that point, I put on my human façade when I left the house, pretended like I was my old happy self but I wasn’t real. I didn’t feel real. Does that make sense?”

Matt nodded, she registered he was holding her hand tightly. 

“I realised one day that he was going to kill me. Not accidentally either, just that one day he was going to decide he was bored of me and kill me. I had to leave but I tried to be smart, took money little by little and all that… I mean, I guess it could have gone well. I wish it had, I wish I could say that that’s why I’m here now because I snuck out one night and ended up here but no, he caught me. He was angry” Kat laughed at that because god, what a fucking understatement. “He grabbed me by my throat and I thought, good this is it he’s so angry he’ll do it quickly and it’ll be over. I should be so lucky, no he wasn’t that nice. He tied me down and…”

A shudder washed over her and she relived it, she decided against going into detail “It was three days before I was found, a neighbour finally heard my screams and called the police. He made no   
attempt at hiding any of it and he was arrested, pleaded guilty so no trial and he’ll be there for life so at the very least I don’t have to worry about that. I tried to stay around after, go back to normal and be myself but I couldn’t. I refused to let myself be defined by it but I couldn’t stay there. My family and friends understood, they all helped out but I had to leave. Everywhere I looked were reminders of what had happened, what I’d been through, what I’ve put up with.”

Her throat felt dry, now all she wanted was to be back in her tiny apartment, wrapped in her too many blankets.

“I just want to rebuild my life a little, feel like myself again. I feel like I’m getting there now, like this is going to be a good new start and I’m glad I met you and Foggy, you’re just what I need in my life right now”

Matt was silent, his face gave her no indication of what he was thinking and Kat felt nauseous. He was probably planning his escape route or thinking of excuses to leave - people had been so uncomfortable around her after it happened, so afraid to say something wrong. She wished she was sober, so she could think of something smart to say, something funny to break the tension but instead she was crying. 

“I should go” she said between sobs, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have told you. I should’ve … “

“No, no Kat” his voice was tight, guarded “I… I’m glad you told me. It’s just hard to hear” 

Another silence. A breeze sent a shiver down her spine. 

“We should get you home, you must be freezing” Matt stood up but held out his arm. They walked back in silence. Kat felt guilty like she’d ruined a good night. 

The sun was close to rising when they got back to their building. They stopped outside her door, “I’ll see you later, thanks for a fun night… sorry” 

“Kat” his voice low and serious “don’t apologise. I asked and you told, I’m glad you did.” He ran his thumb along the side of her hand, a careful but comforting gesture. “You’ll be okay, you’re strong”   
she gave a weak smile. 

“Thanks Matt, goodnight” She pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and walked into her apartment, closing the door softly behind her.

A large glass of water, a pre-emptive pain killer and a sleeping pill were on the menu, then she stripped down to her underwear and curled up in the blankets. Safe and secure she drifted off, for the   
first time in a while she didn’t dream at all.

*** 

It was clearly passed midday when Kat finally lifted her head off her pillow, with a headache and a sinking feeling in her stomach. Cold water splashed against her face woke her up a little, but coffee was what she needed. As she waited for it to brew, she grimaced at the memories of the night before. Most were good, dancing with Foggy. Walking from bar to bar, with them laughing and singing.   
Foggy drunkenly calling Karen and begging for her to come join them. Then she remembered the tears and telling Matt the worst parts of her. God he probably thought she was such a sad case.

The coffee was strong and sweet, it cleared the revenants of alcohol from her brain and she felt herself relax. No point in being upset, she couldn’t take it back and he would have found out eventually. It was a hard secret to keep and it was better to have the truth out there than hide from it. It was her past but she wouldn’t let it hold her there.  
The rest of her afternoon was spent distracting herself, she called her sister on skype and chatted with her for a while – she gave her a quick tour of the apartment, while her sister tried to hide her clear worry.

“You can come home, if you like. Stay with us?” Marie had said, attempting casual but looking too serious to carry it off “The boys miss you, we miss you”

“I miss you too” Kat said sincerely “but I can’t come back, I’m happy here. I’m making friends, I’ve got my job next week. I know the place needs work but it’s better than it was.” 

Marie still looked unsure, Kat sighed “Mar, I love you and Eli and Toby more than I can even say but I just need this right now”

“Okay” not convinced “but if you need us, ever, doesn’t matter time or weather or what. We’ll be there. Kat…” tears were forming in Marie’s eyes, she looked away from the camera and Kat heard her   
choke back the sob. “We’ll just be there okay, always know that”

“I do, I know” an ache of sadness, they’d been so angry at themselves when they’d come to see her in the hospital. For not noticing things and for ignoring others. 

**

Matt was distracted at work, Karen was talking but he wasn’t absorbing the words.

“Hello, earth to Matt” she called, he could feel the air swirl and push against his face. She waving her hand in front of him.

“Hm sorry” he murmured, “hangover” 

“I can’t believe Foggy got you out and I didn’t get to see it” she laughed, an edge of sadness to her voice.

“Yeah it was a fun night, we missed you” He said, she beamed at him. 

“Did Kat enjoy herself?” 

“I think so, she certainly kept up with Foggy” Karen laughed again,

“Good for her! I’m excited to have another girl join the gang, now we’re evenly matched against you boys” she was teasing but Matt was pleased, Karen needed more friends and he liked the thought of   
Kat being part of the ‘gang’. He’d never been good at friends, didn’t know how to make them or keep them. He hated the sympathy that came with the initial stages. Foggy had been his first since… well a long time but now, in the space of 6 months, he had two more. But it meant two more people he was lying too, two more people to hide part of himself from.

**

Foggy had turned up, still half drunk at 1pm. Matt had raised an eyebrow at him, he could smell the drinks from last night, the perfume of the girl he’d spent the night with and the large black coffee he’d just finished. 

“Not a word Murdock, not a word” he’d groaned as he walked past and straight into his office. Within 15 minutes he was asleep at his desk and Matt didn’t have the heart to wake him.

He did however, plan to tell him about Kat. He wasn’t going to keep anymore from Foggy, he’d risked their friendship too much. Foggy was good, he’d know how to handle it, know what to say. Matt   
was tactless at times, he’d hadn’t known what to say to her last night and she’d taken it that he was uncomfortable but no, it wasn’t that – he was angry, so angry, hearing what she’d been through brought home that he could clean up his city as much as he liked, he could spend 24/7 in his mask and on the street there would be people like Kat’s ex, in other cities, hurting people for years without consequences.

He wanted to find him, in whatever prison he was in and make him pay. Really pay.

Kat had still been asleep when he’d left for work in the morning, he listened to her slow even breaths as he got ready, the loud thrum of her heartbeat as he walked down the corridor. The sounds were comforting, he thought he could listen to their rhythms all day.

When Karen went home, Matt woke Foggy and told him what had happened, Foggy – hungover, tired Foggy let out a soft groan as Matt recounted Kat’s story. 

“Oh man, shit…” His head in his hands “I knew there was something, you don’t need heightened senses to know that but” he looked wordlessly at Matt.

“Is she okay? Did she seem okay when you left her?” 

Matt nodded “She was still sleeping when I came to work but she was okay last night, I… listened for a little bit” He heard Foggy huff a little “just to make sure she was okay”

They sat talking for a little while, neither knowing what to do with what they know knew.

“I think” Matt said carefully “I think I’m going to tell her”

“About Daredevil?!” Foggy was incredulous

“No, No not that… not yet” Matt was shaking his head “about my senses, so she knows. I don’t want to… I don’t want to hurt her like I hurt you Foggy. Karen too”

Foggy was quiet but Matt could hear his heart race a little, “You’re a good guy Matt. I know… I was hard on you. I was hurt but I’ve never doubted that you are good. Right down to your core”

Matt doesn’t know if he believes it but he wishes he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ops hope you like this, it's probs a bit boring but I really appreciate feedback and stuff :)


	6. Chapter 6

As the sun began to rise over the city, Matt sat on the rooftop listening to his city wake up. It had been a long night, but successful and he was on an adrenaline high. He took a moment to breathe in the city air, enjoy the cool breeze – it was the first sign spring was on its way.

Below him, he heard Kat’s alarm go off. After almost 3 weeks, Matt knew her routine just as well as he knew his own. He’d forgotten how easy it was to absorb the constant sound of someone else’s life, to live with them as permanent background noise, that’s how it had been in College with Foggy. It was easy to get to know someone whose life you listened to like a soundtrack.

So he knew that she set her alarm for 6:30 because it gave her enough time to brew coffee (strong and sweet, always) and make waffles (usually with peanut butter, sometimes honey) while she listened to whatever musical she felt like that morning – the last few days had been Les Mis, Matt hoped that would change today. .

And he knew she liked to sing loudly (and badly) throughout the day, especially when she was cooking.

He knew she spoke to her family every day, that they missed her and that she’d cry every time she hung up the phone (but only for a few minutes).

She sets her outfit for the day the night before, so all she has to do is pull it on after her shower. 

Lavender and lime were her favourite scents, lavender for the bad days and lime for the good but in the end she always smelt like sweet coffee and old books. 

A week after she’d moved in, he had realised that he probably could have tried harder to push the sounds of her life out of his head but quite frankly, he enjoyed it. She was calming and her presence lightened him in a way he couldn’t quite verbalise.

Of course, Matt kept all this to himself. He still hadn’t found a way to broach the subject of his abilities, to Kat or Karen and the longer it went on – the less ways he could think to explain it without   
coming across as a creep. 

As he heard the sound of running water, and the Into the Woods soundtrack started to play (Matt groaned, he’d been half hoping for Hairspray) he climbed back through his window, muscle protesting and head pounding. Bed would be nice, preferable to the busy day he knew he had ahead but the people needed Matt Murdock, Attorney at law just as much as they needed Daredevil so bed would have to wait. 

A quick and very cold shower woke him up and cleaned off the dirt from the night. He wanted to be able to pull on his shorts, lie down and sleep - but instead he pulled on a suit, it was dirty and wrinkled but it would do, it would have to. 

**

“Morning Matt” Kat called as he walked through her door “Coffees on the worktop”

It had started a few mornings after their night out and had become habit. Matt would turn up at around 8, they would have coffee and then head off their respective places of work. It was a nice way to spend the morning and it always put Kat in a good mood. He was a quiet guy, especially this early but he was good company. 

“Oh god, you look awful” she said, taking a proper look at him.

“Thank you, always a good way to start off the morning” Sarcasm, Matt’s favourite defence 

She didn’t reply, instead she attempted to tidy him up a little – brushing down his suit, running fingers through his hair to flatten it slightly, rearranging his tie. He was still as she did this, a small smile on his face. “I guess you’ll do” she chewed her cheek a little, “Are you okay?” there was a dark bruise forming on his cheek bone. There hadn’t been a day since she’d met Matt that there hadn’t been a   
bruise on his face, but he had a way to dodge every question. 

“Never better” he turned to grab his coffee and all she could do was sigh. 

Change the subject, Kat thought, because it’d be easier to get blood out of a stone than to get Matthew Murdock to talk about something he doesn’t want to.

She’d learnt a lot about him in three weeks but still felt like she didn’t know him. There was too much he was holding back. She watched him drink the coffee. When she talked to her family about him, tried to describe him to her friends, it seemed impossible. Foggy was easy, she could probably talk about Foggy all day because he was an open book (like she was) and Karen too, to an extent.

All the unsaid things made her uneasy but despite that unease - she couldn’t remember the last time she’d been this happy. She couldn’t remember how long it had been since she’d felt free enough to sing at the top of her voice in the morning, to dance around her place in her underwear, to call friends and chat for hours. It was more than she would have ever believed possible a few months ago 

“Busy day?” Matt asked

“Mmm” she nodded took a sip of coffee “I need to go through the book donations for the new kids’ reading corner and put up all the décor and shelves so it’s ready for the first story time next week”   
another sip “but I think I’m meeting Karen for coffee at lunch, if she’s not too busy”

“What do you girls talk about during your lunchtime meetings?” 

Kat put on her best valley girl voice “Oh you know, cute boys, make up, celeb gossip, shoes” she mimed twirling her hair, despite knowing Matt couldn't see it, just to really get into the role. He laughed into his coffee. Truth was that while what Kat and Karen spoke about wasn’t strictly between the two of them, she certainly wouldn’t be the one to let talk about it to someone else, especially not to Matt. 

“Of course, I should have known” Placing the cup on the worktop, he picked up his cane. “You ready?”

“Yup, lead the way Mr. Murdock” She grabbed her bag, slung it on her shoulder and let Matt grab the crook of her elbow.

“It’s never a good idea to let the blind guy lead, did no one tell you?”

**

Karen turned up at Kat’s work at nearly midday, looking stressed and agitated. Her normally straight strawberry blonde hair been whipped into a frenzy by the wind.

“Ugh” was all she had to say, before she slumped onto the ground next to Kat.

“Same” was all Kat could say in return as she sat surrounded by a mess of children’s books and haphazardly cut coloured paper, a pair of scissors tightly held in her hand. 

“I need a strong drink and loud music and to just forget the world exists for 10 minutes”

Kat nods, “I am wholeheartedly behind that” she said as she clipped away at the paper, attempted to create a paper jungle “what happened?”

“Work, Matt and Foggy don’t seem to realise that we’re broke - as in no money at all - and accepting payments in pie form is not going to pay my rent but when I bring it up it’s all ‘we’ll manage’ ‘we’ll think of something and it’s frustrating! I hate nagging, I don't want to be that girl but come on! someone needs sense’

“Mmmm those boys are idealistic” Kat handed Karen a pair of scissors and green paper “make grass with this – so girls night, tonight?”

“God yes!” Karen snips at the green paper for a moment “I have no idea what I’m doing by the way”

“Me either” neither of them could help laughing. 

They spent the next hour in near silence, assembling a card jungle in the corner of the library, by the time Karen was getting ready to face work again, it was looking almost magical.

“You’re doing a good job here, the kids are going to love it” Karen said, hand clasped firmly on Kat’s shoulder as they looked at their effort. 

“I really hope so.” 

“I’ll be at yours at 9 tonight, put on your prettiest dress, highest heels and we’re going to show this city who runs it”

**

Matt walked past Kat’s apartment door and was hit by the strong smell of nail polish, vanilla and vodka. He decided to knock on the door.

He heard her hurry “You’re 30 minutes early….” Kat opened the door, “Oh Matt… sorry I thought, I mean I was expecting Karen. Come in, it’s cold and I haven’t got pants on.”

“Oh?” Matt smirked. 

“I’m in a dress. We’re going out tonight, girl’s night or whatever.”

He knew she was in a dress, it was short – just above her knee – and form fitting, he heard the material press against her skin as she moved. She’d straightened her hair but braided it so it was flat   
against her back. Her perfume was vanilla, new or at least unused for a while. 

“I’m drinking already because this dress is tight and my makeup looks odd and I can’t remember the last time I had a girl night out.”

“I’m sure you look amazing” Matt said softly, Kat rolled her eyes at him but a blush rose to her cheeks. “Why are you nervous? It’s just you and Karen, out having fun”

“I know, it’s just…” Matt heard the hesitation “I… well you know I didn’t date or go out much in college because I was too focused on studying and then straight after… you know, well I haven’t gone out   
much and… ”

He heard her pour a shot, and throw her head back as she tipped it into her mouth. 

Matt felt uneasy, a pang of something twisting in his gut.

“Just, you know. Have a few drinks, dance, and enjoy yourself. Don’t over think it.” Before he could stop himself, he reached out and ran his fingers along the side of her face, they lingered on her cheek   
for a moment. She froze, but didn’t move away from him. 

He took a step closer, so there were only a few inches between them. Her breathing was harsh, heart rate high.

“Can I? Do you mind if I?” He had no idea what he was asking permission for, touch her face some more? Kiss her? Pin her against the wall and pull her stupidly tight dress off with his teeth? No idea at   
all. He felt her frown a little but nod

“Yeah” her voice was shaky.

He opted for thing he wanted to do the most, and pressed his lips against hers. She tasted strongly of vodka and sweet coffee. It only lasted a moment, a knock at the door caused Kat to jump away from him (he bit back a groan of disappointment). Heart fluttering, she laughed shakily “it’s probably Karen”

It was Karen, Matt could hear her long dress fluttering around her knee and her restlessly tapping her high heels against the concrete floor, there was also a slight whiff of tequila.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? Have a good night out” Matt walked to the door, and opened it. 

“Oh Matt?” 

“Long time no see Karen” they laughed, but it was slightly uneasy - Karen was good at reading people, and she was suspicious “I was just leaving, have a good night. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do”

And with that he left them behind, feeling almost giddy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay longish chapter, bit of a time jump but I hope you like it! Are any of you watching S2? i'm only halfway through, I was hoping to get through the whole thing before I jump on a boat for a week to do science things for Uni (bet you couldn't tell I was a science nerd with my terrible writing style ;D) but I'm probably not going to manage it. I love it so far - I obvs won't be including it in here but I'm enjoying the character building. But yeah, comment and all that if you feel like it :) I'm going to be gone for a week so no updates but as soon as I'm back, I will!


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